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Tag Archives: 5 year old

Child development chart: Preschool milestones

By Mayo Clinic staff

Every child grows and develops at his or her own pace. Still, child development tends to follow a fairly predictable path. Check out these general child development milestones for ages 2 to 5. If your child’s development seems to be lagging behind in certain areas, share your concerns with your child’s doctor.

Age 2 Age 3 Age 4 Age 5
Language skills
Links two words together Identifies most common objects Describes the uses of common objects Uses compound and complex sentences
Speaks clearly enough for parents to understand about half the words Says first name and age Speaks clearly enough for strangers to understand Says full name and address
Knows some adjectives (big, happy) Uses pronouns (I, you, we, they) and some plurals Uses verbs that end in “ing” and some irregular past tense verbs, such as ran and fell Uses future tense
Speaks about 50 words Answers simple questions Tells simple stories Understands rhyming
Social skills
Becomes aware of his or her identity as a separate individual Imitates parents and playmates Cooperates with playmates Wants to be like friends
May become defiant Takes turns Tries to solve problems Follows rules
Becomes interested in playing with other children Expresses affection openly Becomes interested in new experiences Understands gender
Separation anxiety begins to fade Easily separates from parents Becomes more independent Wants to do things alone
Cognitive skills
Begins to play make-believe Plays make-believe Becomes involved in more complex imaginary play Uses imagination to create stories
Begins to sort objects by shape and color More confidently sorts objects by shape and color Prints some capital letters and names some colors Correctly names at least four colors and counts at least 10 objects
Understands some spatial concepts (in, on) Understands more spatial concepts (over, under) Understands more complex spatial concepts (behind, next to) Distinguishes between fantasy and reality
Scribbles Copies a circle Draws a person with two to four body parts Copies a triangle and other geometric patterns
Finds hidden objects Understands the concept of two Understands the concepts of same and different Understands the concepts of time and sequential order
Physical skills
Walks alone and stands on tiptoe Walks up and down stairs, alternating feet Stands on one foot for at least five seconds Stands on one foot for at least 10 seconds
Climbs on furniture and begins to run Kicks, climbs, runs and pedals tricycle Throws ball overhand, kicks ball forward and catches bounced ball most of the time Hops, swings and somersaults
Builds a tower of four blocks or more Builds a tower of more than six blocks Dresses and undresses May learn to skip, ride a bike and swim
Empties objects from a container Manipulates small objects and turns book pages one at a time Uses scissors Brushes own teeth and cares for other personal needs

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123 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

123 Magic:  Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

By Thomas Phelan

Book Summary by Lily Talley

HI parents!  I just want to pass this on again to you guys.  I just finished this book and it has some great tips on parenting.  I highly recommend buying the book and then reading these notes.  It has tons of practical tips on many disciplining situations you can think of.  Hope this helps!

3 Steps to Effective Parenting

  1. Controlling obnoxious behaviour
  2. Encouraging good behaviour
  3. Strengthening your relationship with your chil

Stop Behaviour

Ÿ         Children are doing something you want them to stop

Ÿ         These are frequent and minor everyday hassles that kids present to you.  For example:  whining, disrespect, tantrums, arguing, teasing, fighting, pouting, yelling

Start behaviour

Ÿ         Children are doing something you would like them to start

Ÿ         For example:  positive activities such as cleaning their rooms, doing homework, practicing the piano, getting up and out in the morning, going to bed, eating supper, being nice to people

Use the Counting Technique (1-2-3) for STOP behaviour.

Use these 7 Tactics for  START behaviour.

  1. Praise
  2. Simple request
  3. Kitchen timer
  4. Docking system
  5. Natural consequence
  6. Charting
  7. Variation of 1-2-3

Parents’ big mistake is that they treat children like little adults.

Ÿ         They use words to explain things to kids.

Ÿ         You can add more talking when they are older.

Ÿ         One explanation is fine, repeated explanation gets us in trouble.

2 Biggest Discipline Mistakes

  1. Too much talking
  2. Too much emotion

Too much talking and explaining irritates and distracts children.  If you show your kids that you are upset they will feel powerful.  You need to be consistent, decisive and calm.

Explanations are appropriate when the behaviour is new or unusual.  When you talk more your discipline message fundamentally changes.  (“You don’t have to behave unless I can give you 5-6 reasons why you should“.)

Tips:

What to do in public?

Ÿ         The long-term welfare of your kids comes before short-term worries about what others are going to think.

Ÿ         Use a time-out place (or the car).

Ÿ         Keep moving, don’t let the tantrum disrupt you from what you are doing.

Ÿ         Don’t take them unless you have to.

Sibling Rivalry

Ÿ         Count both kids that are fighting.

Ÿ         Never ask ‘What happened?’ or ‘Who started it?’ because they are not gonna admit they started the fight.

Ÿ         Don’t expect an older child to act more mature during a fight that a younger child, punish them both fairly.

Time-out does not start until tantrum is over.  You start the timer for the time-out after they have calmed down.

6 Kinds of Testing and Manipulation

  1. Badgering=the child keeps after you and after you and after you, trying to wear you down.  For example:  please please please!!! Can I have some?  Can I?  Can I?
  2. Temper (Intimidation)=tantrums are prolonged if a) the child has an audience b) the adults involved continue talking arguing or pleading to the youngster c) if the adult doesn’t know what to do
  3. Threat=“I’m going to run away!”
  4. Martyrdone=“No one here loves me anymore!”
  5. Butter-up=the child tries to make you feel good, the parent can feel scared that they might frustrate this good feeling if they don’t give what they want.  This is an advance set-up for parent guilt.  For example:  “Mom you have such great eyes!” and then later says can I have a twinkie 30 mins before dinner.
  6. Physical tactics=physical attact, breaking something, running away

Whining is a type of badgering and martyrdom.

Develop a major/minor system.  Develop major/minor consequences for major/minor behaviour.

Lying

2 Types of Lying

  1. Lying by making up stories and boost ego
  2. Lying to avoid trouble

With lying either you know the truth or you don’t.  Don’t keep asking to find out the truth, this just gives children more opportunity to practice lying.  Believe what they say, if you find our later they lied, punish the behaviour.

The 7 Start  Behaviour Tactics

  1. Positive Reinforcement=use a lot of praise tailored to the child, not to the point of embarassment, praise them in front of other people and give them unexpected praise.
  2. Simple request=when making a simple request, use a matter of fact voice.  For example:  “John it’s dinner time.”
  3. Kitchen timers=use the timer to measure the time you’re giving them to finish the task.  For example:  You have 5 mins to tidy up the table, then set timer straight away.  When 5 mins is up they need to be done or a consequence will be given.
  4. Docking system=“If you don’t do the work, I will do it for you buy you pay me”.  Have a source of funds, allowance or save cash birthday gifts for this technique.
  5. Natural consequences=if they don’t wear their coat, let them feel the cold later.  Hopefully being cold (natural consequence) will teach them the lesson.
  6. Charting=use a calendar to keep track of how the child is doing and give incentive, use a lot of praise with this
  7. Counting for brief start behaviour=use this for brief things you want them to do but they are refusing.  For example:  hanging up their coat, feeding the cat

My favorite method that I also use with the kids I nanny.  The Garbage Bag method.  Tell the kids to pick up the things they don’t want in the garbage bag by 6pm.  After 6pm everything not picked-up will go in the bag and the children lose the right to use the item until 6pm the next day.  You determine the time for this.

This book has a lot more tips on how to use the 7 tactics.  My advice is to get the book and use this summary to refresh your memory when it’s time to discipline the kids.

THERE IS NO SINGLE FORMULA FOR PARENTING.  EACH FAMILY HAS DIFFERENT WAYS OF PARENTING THEIR CHILDREN.  I BELIEVE THAT THESE BOOKS ARE HERE FOR US TO LEARN FROM AND NOT TO DICTATE HOW WE SHOULD RAISE OUR CHILDREN.  HOW WE RAISE OUR OWN CHILD IS STILL FOR US TO DECIDE, AND DECISIONS SHOULD BE MADE FOR THE BETTER OF THE CHILD.

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Tips on How to Help Your Child Have a Smooth Transition to Preschool

Tips on How to Help Your Child Have a Smooth Transition to Preschool

By Lily Talley

Preschools are schools that provide care and education typically for children ages 2-5.  These schools provide care, socialization, enrichment, play and education.  Children who attend preschools are exposed to opportunities for learning.  They have the advantage of interacting with children of the same age and taking part in teacher planned activities and experiences.

Children are not required to go to preschool but if they do, there are a number of benefits such as:

  • Exposing them to a variety of experiences and imaginative play
  • Helping them develop independence and self-esteem
  • Helping them learn cooperation, sharing, taking turns and function as part of a group
  • Stimulating their curiosity
  • Facilitating speech and language
  • Exposing them to a variety of arts and crafts, books and music
  • Exposing them to mathematical concepts and the environment
  • Promoting their physical strength, coordination and stamina
  • Developing their desire for learning

You should find a preschool that offers a good quality program, is affordable and geographically convenient.  There are different types of preschools such as the play-based, Montessori, and Waldorf schools.  If you are going to choose a preschool with an academic program, make sure that it is developmentally appropriate to each age group, is fun and stresses the importance of play.  You need to find your educational philosophy and find a school that meets most of it.

There are a number of books that you can borrow from your local library that will help you learn more about preschools and what to expect from them.  I included a book list at the bottom of this article if you want to do some further reading and research.

The main question that parents ask before they send their kids to preschool is “How can I best prepare my child?”  Whether you are a working or a stay-at-home mom, you want the best care and experience for your child while they are away from home.  Your child can also have a hard time separating from you for the first few days or weeks of going to preschool.

To best prepare you child to going to preschool and avoid ‘separation anxiety’, here are some few tips:

  • Begin using the words school in everyday conversation (for example:  Cousin Jacks goes to school and he likes the toys, or mommy went to school when she was young and she met new friends).
  • Read books to your child about preschool
  • When you are walking with your child point out a school, ideally the school that they will be attending.
  • Allow them to be accustomed to being taken care of by other adults such as a extended family members or babysitters.
  • Allow them to play with other children of the same age.
  • Play peek-a-boo, when you leave your child for a moment tell them, ‘mommy will be right back’ and then say, ‘see mommy came back’ when you return.  If you return from work or a long shopping trip, you can say, ‘see mommy always comes back’.  This will set the stage for successful separation.
  • If you know the child’s future teacher, talk to them by name.
  • If you are anxious yourself about sending your child to preschool, hide it with an excited smile. J

Doing all the above tips does not guarantee a smooth transition for some kids.  Especially if you are a stay-at-home mom, your child is used to seeing just you for most of the time.  It is natural for them to look for mommy when surrounded with unfamiliar faces.  If it’s the first day of school and your child experiences some anxiety, try to do the following:

  • Tell your child that you love him and that you will be back to take him home right after lunch (or whatever the last activity is).  This assures them that you will return and at a specific time.
  • Always smile and give them lots of hugs
  • Ask your child how they would like to say goodbye, this will give them a measure of control (e.g. want to say goodbye to mommy at the door?).
  • Act silly before you leave so the child is left giggling.
  • Let the teacher know when  you are leaving so she can distract your child with fun activities.
  • Leave a comfort toy or anything meaningful to your child that will remind them of home and mommy or daddy.

If your child cries the first day or if they cry every time you take them to school, try the following:

  • Gradual separation:  simply stay as long as your child needs you in school, if you can’t stay, ask a family member, your nanny, or your child’s favorite neighbor.  You should stay at the back of the room and don’t interact unless they approach you.  You are there for support not as a playmate.  Usually after a few days, you child will get used to the routine and won’t need you to stay.
  • Shorter mornings:  bring your child to school for an hour.  Try to leave them for that time and stay outside and see how they do.  Always assure them ‘see mommy came back’. 
  • Later entry:  if all else fails, it’s probably best to keep your child at home for a while and then send them to preschool the next year or just wait a few months until they are a bit older to come back.  While doing this, make sure you expose them to people other than you to take care of them and schedule playdates. 

I hope the above tips are helpful.  Going to preschool is just the first fun experience your child will have growing up.  You have done some research and followed some tips, now it’s time to send your kids to school and have fun!

References:

Preschool Primer for Parents by Doris Herman

Preschool Success by Amy James

The Preschool Handbook by Barbara Brenner

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Seattle Learning Center, Preschool and Playcare in Queen Anne

Dear Parents,

We updated our tuition rates to accommodate your needs.  If you have any questions please call us at 206-799-2845 or email us at:  info@seattlelearningcenter.com.

Best regards,

Lily Talley

www.seattlelearningcenter.com

Tuition schedule (per month)

Fees (including food)

Preschool Only

Full-time (4-5 days a week)

Part-time (2-3 days a week)
3 and 4 year olds $675 $495
5 year olds $645 $465

Including Playcare
3 and 4 year olds $875 $595
5 year olds $845 $565
Playcare $30/day, $120/week, $300/month 12-3pm, Mon-Fri
Discounts on siblings $50 For the 2nd & 3rd child

Fees (not including food)

Preschool Only

Full-time (4-5 days a week)

Part-time (2-3 days a week)
3 and 4 year olds $575 $395
5 year olds $545 $365

Including Playcare
3 and 4 year olds $775 $495
5 year olds $745 $465
Playcare $30/day, $120/week, $300/month 12-3pm, Mon-Fri
Discounts on siblings $50 For the 2nd & 3rd child

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